The following is a recent conversation I had with my 8-year-old son D- and 5-year-old daughter M-, the tone of which is predictably not all that rare around here:
D- (sharing an announcement with the world) : She LICKed meeeeee!
M- (feebly beginning a defense): No...
Me: M-, did you lick him?
M- (thinking better of it): Yes... Because he was being a jerk, and wouldn't stop!
Me: It's not a good strategy to use your germs as a weapon. And it's never a good idea to ever LICK an 8-year-old...
D- (almost proudly): Yeah, especially THIS one!
You may enjoy my previous D- conversations, M- conversations, and (wife) J- conversations.