26 June 2008

A conversation with D-: Prom theme for 2022 is 'Loneliness'

For this conversation with my 4-year-old son to work, you must read all of my lines like the bridgekeeper from Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

D-: Daddy, um, can you play with me?

Me: Yes, I can, but first you must answer me these questions three.

D-: What??

Me: What, is your name?

D-: Daddy?

Me: No, your name!

D-: Oh, D-.

Me: What, is your quest?

D-: I wanna play. (I was shocked that he gave a valid response to this one.)

Me: What, is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

D-: What? (correct answer, as many of you may know, is "African or European?")

Eventually, with many years of similarly patient effort, I'll have created a stunningly handsome and athletic nerd who cracks himself up for the next generation to under-appreciate.

10 comments:

Charlene Hefferin said...

You really crack me up!

Kori said...

You appear to be up to the task, though.

Mrs. B. Roth said...

Do you eat ham and jam and spam a lot?

Your house is a silly place.

Mama Dawg said...

I love this movie. I just got it on DVD and my daughter, poor thing, just can not understand why mommy is laughing at stuff that is clearly (to her) not funny.

Swirl Girl said...

Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be thththtrrreeee. (visual tongue rolling)

Both my girls can recite Monty Python!

love it!

Natalie said...

should i admit that i have never seen monty python? nah...i'll just pretend to know exactly what you are talking about!

Trooper Thorn said...

If you school him well in reciting Monty Python, you can be sure to keep him safe from dating any girls all through high school. Now if only there was a way I could turn my daughter into boy-kryptonite.

LiteralDan said...

Charlene Hefferin: I do try, though, don't I?

Kori: Oh I am more than up to it-- I was born ready.

Mrs. B Roth: We also do routines and chorus scenes with footwork im-pec-cable.

Mama Dawg: In time, she will learn, Emily-- when the time is right, she will take up your crown and wear it proudly.

Swirl Girl: Five is right out! You've done well as a parent, but you may have the same problem as me unless your kids can find kids like mine to hang out with.

Natalie: Oh, Natalie, stop pretending. Do yourself a huge favor and rent "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" and "Monty Python's Life of Brian". You have the wacky sense of humor required to greatly enjoy the hilarious insanity.

Trooper Thorn: I think what's good for the goose is good for the gander. There's little worse than the mirthful thrusting of Monty Python references on an unsuspecting bystander.

Case in point-- poor Natalie above, and all the dozens of people who stopped by and didn't leave comments, likely out of sheer confusion and disgust.

SherE1 said...

My husband says random stuff like that to confuse the kids (and me) all the time. I find it hilarious! Most especially if I know what he's talking about. Half the time I don't. But I laugh anyway. I'm easy like that.

LiteralDan said...

Your husband sounds nearly as awesome as me. However, let it be known that as a huge copycat, he can never quite attain my level coolness.

You sound like a comedian's dream come true, and a gift to people like me.