27 July 2009

Classic quotes, Vol. 18

I've been a bit overloaded with quotes lately, hence I'm here again less than two weeks later with a few more quotes from my wife J-, my 5-year-old son D-, my 2-year-old daughter M-, and me:

J- (yet again underappreciating my hilarity one night): You're evil! I'm going to bed without you. (remembering) ...Except there's a spider over the bed and I need you to come kill it.

M- (grinning from ear to ear in enthusiastic disbelief about something, several times a day): "Cheese Ma-wheeze!"*

Me (to J-, who was questioning my attention to detail in wrapping a child's birthday present): Well, why make the bed if you're just going to mess it up and have to do it again all over tomorrow?? ...That little nugget of wisdom would probably carry a lot more weight if we actually made the bed every day.

M- (freestyling to a heartwarmed J-, now far outclassed in her impromptu "I love you" contest): I love you, and I buhv you, and I picked you out from the Momma's Day store!**

My sister (recent college graduate, with an elementary education degree, no less): How do you spell "college"?***



*Actually, both kids have been saying this one for awhile (trying to say, "Geez Louise!", of course), but M- seems to say it more often, and now it's already morphed into "Cheese My-wheeze!" I guess though, when you think about it, it's an equally valid substitute for exclaiming, "Jesus!" outright.

** For those of you who just threw up, I only included this for posterity, as well as for the sizable portion of my readership who enjoys those sappy Anne Geddes babies-in-costumes kinds of things. And who overappreciate kittens.

*** I'd probably be in big trouble if I didn't point out that she was very tired, and merely second-guessing herself as she stared at the computer screen, deep into the spacey depths of Decompression Summer.

10 comments:

Mary said...

Hey, moms like that I love you stuff. Helps keep all the I hate yous from sticking.

Swirl Girl said...

my kids say Cheeze Looeeze all the time...I gues it's better than "oh #$@#$#@" which they may have heard from me sometime ....

Jocelyn said...

I love the Sister Disclaimer at the end. I teach college-level writing, and maaaaaaaaaaany of my students spell the place they are at as "collage." I sometimes advise them that if they can't spell it correctly, they probably shouldn't be there.

Yea, they love me.

Pearl said...

Reminds me of my friend with the self-defecating sense of humor.

:-)
Pearl

Mike said...

Your home sounds a lot like mine. We genuises have never been really appreciated in our own time....

A Free Man said...

You know, I still don't know the answer to this question that you posed:

"Well, why make the bed if you're just going to mess it up and have to do it again all over tomorrow??"

What is it?

LiteralDan said...

According to all the guides to fine living I've read, mostly it's just something to do to pass the time until the sweet release of death.

Sprite's Keeper said...

I can understand where your sister's coming from. Sometimes, I'll just look at a word, even if spelled right, and think there's something WRONG about it.
Also the spider comment? I heart J- for that. I've done the same thing so many times to John. No matter how angry I am at him, I will put aside my anger to have him kill a spider or whatever is not supposed to be in my home before I put the shield of anger up again.

Heidi said...

These are great!!

Joe said...

If your sis was staring at the 'puter screen when she was second guessing herself, why didn't she just looks for the squiggly red line under the word? You should have told her it was spells "collage". Hilarity could have ensued.