23 September 2009

Important Question: Or is that kind of sleep orgasmic enough?

These are the things about which one begins to wonder when forced to read or watch a story more than 10 times:

If the nice fairies in Sleeping Beauty had the power to alter the evil fairy's killing spell, why didn't they just say that when she turned 16, she'd touch a spindle, receive a deliciously near-fatal orgasm, and then develop a lifelong obsession with spinning wheels?

Why make her, the royal family, and everyone who works in their castle, fall asleep indefinitely while waiting for a chance encounter to bring them back to daily life? How is that the easiest solution, even if we decide they were limited by adapting the language without the intent of the spell?

Can you imagine missing out on a decade without realizing it? Strutting around with bell bottoms and pork-chop sideburns when everyone else is gelled up with Hammer pants... the horrors go on.

Which decade would you pick to skip, and why?



After you're done pondering this, you might want to weigh in on some other of Life's Most Important Questions, especially the original.

18 comments:

Joe said...

I'd skip the first 10 years of my life, because I can't remember them anyway.

I've never seen Sleeping Beauty, and don't see that changing in the foreseeable future either.

Mama Dawg said...

Well, I've only lived through the fashions of the 80's, 90's and the present day ones. I wouldn't skip any of them. I loved the fun fashions of the 80's. There's a few specific crazes in the 90's that I'd like to skip but otherwise, I wasn't a trendy dresser so I was never over the top like others.

I'm a plain non decorated v-neck shirt with a skirt or pants kinda gal. Can't go wrong there.

Sally HP said...

Well Jeez, now you have to go and ruin my mindless viewing of the plethora Disney classics in my house. While there are debatable phallic symbols throughout the illustrations in the movies (ie the 'Penis castle' on Little Mermaid, I'm thinking a near fatal orgasm may be going over the top...'may'.

As for skipping decades, I don't know that I would...I was young enough that if I skipped one, I'd be deprived of the viewing of my sister's with mile-high hair, and the resulting blackmail photos for later in life.

And the nineties were just sweet so...

Neena said...

You're weird.

And, I'd skip ages 8-18. Life got much easier when I could buy my own cigarettes.

Middle Aged Woman said...

WHy is blogger messing with me this a.m.? This is my third attempt! I don't even remember my original comment.

Kori said...

I don't know, a near-fatal orgasm might be payment enough for an obsession with spinning wheels....

Mrs. B. Roth said...

I totally clicked the near-fatal orgasm link ... was hoping for a news report.

I'd skip my own decade from age 12-22 (oh yeah, that's the 90's) ... but keep the fashion and music, baby. Grunge will be coming back in a while, right? I'll save my favorite plaid over-shirt, just in case. Except for the music of 97-98 ... too many working-at-a-pizza-place related memories then.

Shannon said...

I guess my pick would be the 90s... as those were my high school years. Well, the first four years of the decade, anyway.

Ugh, just thinking about high school is giving me the heebie jeebies...

Trooper Thorn said...

I wouldn't skip any of them, but it makes me think about the complicated magical punishements in fairy tales. Why did the witch turn all the servants into furniture in "Beaty and the Beast" just because the Prince was a rude ass? They were just doing their jobs weren't they?

Swirl Girl said...

I 'came into my own' when I hit my 30's. Before that - well, I'd just like to have slept through it. All of it.

and I have something for you at my place - no , it's not a Bingo)

James (SeattleDad) said...

Does it have to be one decade? or can it be 10 years in increments?

1987-92 (First wife)
1987-92 (Can I repeat this stretch on my list?)

LiteralDan said...

Trooper Thorn, this must be acknowledged publicly:

Oh man, thank you!! I swear I must have asked this of somebody somewhere in the blogosphere some time in the past year, cause it is really familiar. [Anyone out there? Ring a bell? Miss Grace, maybe?]

It's really bugged me, among other things, for a long time.

For example, why would the town forget about a castle that huge that close by in that short an amount of time, especially when half the population of the nearby towns would have disappeared inexplicably after going in to work that day???

I demand an answer, Disney!

Silindile Ntuli said...

This question hits home to me in a way, because I have amnesia I woke up on the 27th April 2009 thinking it was 18 March 2003, I was horrified to find out I'm now 25yrs old and just about everything in this world has changed.

As for Sleeping Beauty those fairytales always leave me saying well that was stupid why not just take the easy way out.

Take Snow white, how long was she in that glass coffin unable to breathe? She should've died but nope.

Or the frog kissing girl, I mean come on what possesses someone to pick up a frog and plant a big one on it?

Middle Aged Woman said...

You'll not find an answer to that question from a female blogger (small 'b'). We are all too gushy to question a Disney Princess.

Aunt Juicebox said...

I'd skip most of the 90's too. They involve my worst years of school and two of the worst relationships I've ever had.

Keith Wilcox said...

I haven't lived through enough decades to toss one yet. If I had to ditch a segment of a decade it would be the early 90's. Probably 91-93. Grunge sucked, grunge style sucked, woodstock2 sucked, and so did leaving the 80's behind. I'll never forgive the 90's for that! :-)

Anonymous said...

It is very interesting for me to read that blog. Thank author for it. I like such topics and anything connected to them. I would like to read more on that blog soon.

Anonymous said...

Keep on posting such themes. I love to read stories like that. By the way add more pics :)