06 March 2009

The rules of D-, Vol. 3

Here is another rule for life as subliminally dictated by my 4-year-old son D-:

1. Whenever one or more action figures are set aside, they must always be lain in a 69 position. Certain case-by-case exceptions are allowed only when a position of equal or greater inappropriateness springs to mind.*

These two action figures finally feel free after having been caught in the act(Updated to add picture)



* The nascent mixture of permanently naked dolls on our floors should soon make this rule even more titillating.

17 comments:

Mama Dawg said...

Just be thankful it's not naked Barbies.

BedsideTalesMan said...

How true!!!!

our kids do some funky stuff with acttion figures and dolls. it's just not right!

Middle Aged Woman said...

What, no pictures?

Kmommy said...

LOL!! I also would have liked a picture ;)
My younger brother and sister actually did some naked photo shoots of barbies... so you have about 3 or 4 more years to go until you get something more provocative ;)

LiteralDan said...

Hmmm... good idea, maybe I'll add a picture to the post this weekend.

I'll have to label the post NC-17 then, at least for any young action figures who might be reading.

Zip n Tizzy said...

We were given an anatomically correct little boy baby doll when T was born. We finally passed it on, not because WE were SO afraid of anatomically correct baby dolls but because this one was quite lewd and was frequently found corrupting our poor child.
(Think teething... gah!)

family affairs said...

Just popped in to say "hi" as we were in the best of blog comp together last year....looks like everything going well! Lx

LiteralDan said...

Okay, done aaaaaand done. Now you can enjoy the same explicit image that I did, re-created here for your edification.

And Zip n Tizzy, as creepy as the smooth-crotched dolls may be, I have to say that sounds a lot worse.

Candid Carrie said...

Recreated?

I our house we call it "monkey see, monkey do!"

And because my new book will be called, "Literal Dan, The Man Behind The Eyes," I need to know the gender of these action figures. Thanks.

Midlife Mama said...

ROFL OMG this is hilarious. And they both look male. So the "don't ask, don't tell" thing applies for actin figures too, hmm? :) The same rule that says all action figures must rest in the 69 position is the same rule as the bread must fall peanut-butter side down on the counte when dropped. LOL!

Thanks for the great laugh this Monday morning!

Miss Grace said...

Is he...aware of the implications?

Father Muskrat said...

That is filthiliously awesome. I love what Google ads did with this content, too.

Kori said...

hahahahahhahahhah, I LOVE the photo. Very scintillating stuff!

beth said...

Mommies and Daddies getting their jollies, I guess.

ciara said...

lmao @ that photo

Father Muskrat said...

I just came back to see that filthy photo again. Filthy Dan. Filthy, filthy Dan. Not Literal. Just filthy.

Mrs. B. Roth said...

Ick.

(I think that's German for "gross")

(Which is German for "big")

I took French in High School.

And Latin in college.

And, I just sat on a juice box.

Wait, is this twitter, or a blog comment box?

I'm lost.