02 November 2011

Things that amuse me, Vol. 10

Here's another selection of items that have been amusing me since the last time I posted a collection of these:

1. At 7 months old*, my son E- discovered that pulling one's tethered pacifier out and forcibly unclipping it instantly creates a devastatingly effective set of nunchuks with which one can threaten people to meet various demands.

2. It's come to my attention that I've recently been keeping about the same hours as a house cat. Except, without all the naps. I guess that's not really amusing, but instead subtly tragic. Maybe I should go find myself a sunny spot on the floor by a window somewhere... after I finish thoroughly licking myself and then staring alertly out the window for a few hours.

3. My wife's very simple explanation for the baby's sudden crying jag in the other room, "Oh, he just got really excited about the thing in his hand, and he fell over."

4. In case they needed another reason to pity them, basketball coaches for 7-year-olds have so many fewer weapons than those of older kids. The kids are too oblivious to respond to the tried-and-true psychological torments that are the hallmarks of coaching; they don't really much care if they make a shot, so long as they get to take one; and, for example, when sternly warned that continued misbehavior would mean one of my son's teammates would, "have to run to the end of the court and back", all his teammates immediately leaped up, hands in the air, shouting, "I wanna run! I want to run!!!"

* Now outdated, as he's currently 10 months old and thinks pacifiers are SO lame.


Sarah L said...

Cats sleep when they choose in amounts no longer than 10 or 20 minutes. I learned this the hard way. Is that really what you are doing?

I bet you never do get a minute to stare out the window, unless looking for a child at play.

7 years olds just want a turn! Sounds like fun.

Mary said...

Kind of like kids picking blades of grass in the outfield, oblivious to the baseball on its way to them. The kids are not always quite sure what is supposed to happen. Soccer teams of young players move as a giant group with the ball instead of playing positions because they want to run.

J.C. Mogensen said...

I have a good friend with a 1yr old son and I'm wondering what the right age is to give him a slingshot. The idea of pacifier martial arts is intriguing, but I think something with a bit of range might be more entertaining. Maybe a BB gun? I should add that my friend refuses to pay me the $10 he owes so I have a vested interest in arming his son.

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Trooper Thorn said...

1. Has E moved on to using his bottle as a fighting staff a la Little John?

2. What hours do house cats keep? I thought they employed an "as needed" schedule like firemen.

3. I often get excited about the thing in my hand, but I get out of the shower before I fall over.

4. Shame-based motivation is less effective when the subjects of training have no shame.