29 October 2010

Things my wife hates

The following is just a small sampling, put into list form, of the things my wife hates, as plucked from a recent conversation while pregnant AND sick with a stomach flu.

1. Stupid children acting like stupider children.*

2. Feeling sick just thinking about food.

3. Feeling hungry all the time anyway.

4. Stupid teachers acting like the stupidest children.

5. Pooping at work.

* Ranting about our tender, young, innocent children? No, not this time. She teaches junior high in a special ed school for kids with behavioral problems. The kids who get kicked out of literally everywhere else they could go, end up on her doorstep.**

** A barbed doorstep made 18" thick of solid, pure, American-made Tough Love.


LiteralDan said...

Believe me when I assure you her cursed illness must have really left her with no other choice, because this woman would ordinarily hold it for weeks when that's what it takes to make it home for her... Me Time.

LiteralDan said...

Points to those who notice the Easter Egg not-so-subtly buried in this short post. I'm sure I could have been more theatrical if I'd been posting more often, or more elaborately, lately.

But it's just yet one more weak excuse why I haven't been able to force myself to make the time to sit down and write more!

Father Knows (Travis) Best said...

No one likes pooping at work. It's disgusting — especially when there's no tissue toilet covers. I end up inspecting the seat for, like, an hour before sitting down. Shameful, but necessary in my mind.

Shannon said...

I was wondering about that Easter egg... then I read your postscript...


wahdaholic said...

People really don't like pooping, nobody likes it,