02 June 2009

Classic quotes, Vol. 15

Here is a selection of recent quotes from my 5-year-old son D-, 2-year-old daughter M-, my wife J-, and me:

M- (out of the blue, answering J-'s generic question about whether she's excited to grow up): Yes, I want to get bigger so I can wear a bwah!*

Me (squinting without glasses in the shower as I speak to the kids with an accusatory but unsurprised tone, pointing right by my foot): Hey guys, is that poop?? (picking it up) ...Oh, no, it's just a tiny carrot peel and a bunch of brown thread.**

M- (smiling as she tastes a jar of banana puree I found in the cabinet from the days before she could offer such eloquent food criticism): This has a good fway-vor!

D- (as a deep-voiced Incredible Hulk, apparently learning to channel his powers into productive areas): ... I would ask some workers about knocking down an old building, then I'd say, 'I'm The Green Hulk!' and smash it down to pieces! Smash it to pieces for them with punching!!

M- (holding a piece of butterfly-printed fabric around herself): I have a butterfly belt, cause I'm a butterfly! ...pirate.

* I have a troubled feeling she's going to stay ahead of the curve into adulthood, bringing home bounties of drama and strife every day from third grade on.

** I ended up forgetting it on the shelf of the shower, so a bleary-eyed J- got to share the pleasure of the same dilemma the next morning.


Anonymous said...

your shower scares me. My OCD makes me want to come clean it...thoroughly!

unmitigated me said...

So, your first instinct, on seeing something that looks like poop, is to reach for it?

Mary said...

I agree with MAW - you wonder and then to satisfy your curiosity you pick it up rather than wait and get your glasses??? "I had to wash my hands anyway" should have been a warning.

Christy said...

Doing everything earlier than you ever imagined is the beauty of having a second child my friend. :)

Swirl Girl said...

third grade?? the whole boob thing sprouts around 2nd grade.

and we call them bubble holders around here, but they sound much cuter with the impediment.

Ashly Star said...

A butterfly pirate? Aha! That rocks.

I love when you do these quotes. Your kids are too cute. =)

Ali said...

My son thought a 'bwah' was called 'nipple'. We had a very confusing conversation before THAT was straightened out!

Mrs. B. Roth said...

Your kids crack me up.

(Brilliant comment Brandy, you're really contributing to the conversation here! No really. Keep commenting. This blog couldn't do with out your wit and insight!)

Shut up. At least I got my "your" and "you're" right. This time.

Irrational Dad said...

I just read through the comments three times, trying to figure out who "Brandy" is.

It's been a long day.

LiteralDan said...

Hey Joe, don't feel bad-- that was just Mrs. B(randy) Roth talking to herself. She's kind of like the crazy old cat lady we all tolerate/ignore as much as possible.

This is my way of testing to see if she comes back to read later comments. Just kidding, number one commenter!