19 November 2008

Indisputable facts, Vol. 2

Here are more indisputable facts from the long list kept by the world's ultimate authority:

1. It's nearly impossible to support a family of four on a teacher's salary, particularly when that salary was agreed to by the worst union in the history of human society.

2. Kids are incapable of wearing a hooded garment without putting on the hood, regardless of weather or any other potentially dissuading factors.

3. I need to make some changes in my life.

4. If I were to get rid of every item in my house that has gotten inappropriate bodily fluids on it at some point or other, I would have very few personal belongings left. And definitely nowhere to sit.

19 comments:

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

My entire life is made of inappropriate body fluids.

Sad, really.

unmitigated me said...

It's nearly impossible to support a family of four on a teacher's salary, even when that salary was agreed to by the best union in the history of human society.

Chris M. said...

It's nearly impossible to support a family of four...unless you're a doctor, lawyer or inside trader.

-Chris
Weather Moose

Anonymous said...

Boy, do I understand! I've got inappropriate body fluids coming out the wazoo!

Oh, wait. That doesn't sound right...

The Stiletto Mom said...

If I had to throw away everything with bodily fluids covering it, not only would I have no where to sit, I'd also be naked.

Russ said...

That's why my Father, a teacher, worked three jobs while my sister and I grew up.

I disagree, my son will not wear the hood on a sweatshirt.

no comment on the others, particularly the bodily fluid one. I don't even want to know...

Kevin McKeever said...

At first I thought I was being overprecautious, but now I'm glad I thoroughly disinfected myself and my child after we had dinner with your family the other week.

Jenni said...

Here, here to number 4.

Gromit said...

so you need to work hard to earn more money?
how is the economic there??

cash is king now

Aliceson said...

Do you know how hard it is to find a sweatshirt without a hood, or without High School Musical crap plastered all over it? Not happening.

Ali said...

It is also nearly impossible to support a family of 4 on a policeman's salary. Which is why I have ads on my blog. I think I've made enough for a gallon of milk. Woot!

Jenny Grace said...

That all sounds about EXACTLY right.

Anonymous said...

Put those kids to work. That's why we have kids. So they can support us to the lifestyle we want to become accustomed.

Unknown said...

I can't believe you allow yourself to THINK how difficult it is to support a family of four - those kinds of thoughts render me useless for the day...

now..thanks.

Renee said...

Maybe you should grow a mustache. I don't know how this will affect numbers one and two, but three would be covered, and you might be able to make a slight dent in four.

Ew, did I just write that? YEAH I did.

Everyday Goddess said...

You have time to sit down with four kids?

People in the Sun said...

We're so alike! I also like to pee on chairs!

Irrational Dad said...

That reminds me... I need to get my carpet scrubber out again and steam clean my carpets. Man... there's some nasty things that babies can do, eh?

Michael from dadcation.com said...

I'm tired of the scrawlings on my once-fairly-nice leather sofa. And yes, the fluids on the area rugs are nasty.

And being a lawyer who's heading a household of five still isn't easy, especially if the house (and mortgage) was selected when said lawyer was single.