24 November 2008

It's hip to be timely

I know I haven't had too much to say about my wife on this blog, but it's not for lack of amusing stories or anything else. I just tend to procrastinate when it comes to writing about important things, and on many occasions I've let opportunities pass by where J- would be revealed as the amazing and funny person she is.

After a month or two of procrastinating, things start to feel stale and tedious and they pile up in my Drafts folder.

Take our fifth anniversary over a month ago-- wouldn't you expect some sappy post with a scrapbook of pictures and such? Or, knowing me, some sarcastic post with one picture, two at most, and a handful of tangential footnotes? I actually have more than a few pictures and a ridiculous story to tell about that day, but there it sits, and probably will for a while longer yet.

But that's not what this post is about.

Since I haven't said all that much about her, you won't mind me completely mischaracterizing her in your minds by way of introducing the subject of this post: almost six years ago now, she violently ripped the lining of her right hip socket while kickboxing.

She has limped along ever since on her remaining hip, which wasn't so great to begin with, trying and failing for various reasons (including lovely insurance debacles and poorly timed pregnancies) to have the problem surgically corrected. As you can imagine, the pregnancies made that hip sing like a finely tuned machine.

She's sleeping as I write this, as I should be, but today at noon she will fall asleep again. While she's sleeping, she'll be sliced open and have her femur yanked out of the socket, to allow the doctors to scrape out the remaining shreds of labrum and grind into oblivion the pesky bone spur on the end of her femur that started all this mess.

Then, assuming all goes well, they'll stitch her back up and send her hobbling on her merry way, to slowly recover over the next month and a half as she avoids putting any pressure on that leg so the bone doesn't shatter before it's completely healed.

Such is the fun she's bravely facing this holiday season, starting with a Thanksgiving spent as the immobile centerpiece for my extended family's celebration at my parents' house.*

Why is this happening now, you ask? Because she wanted to be sure she'd miss as few school days as possible, while not passing up another chance to get this done once and for all by waiting till next summer. She fills me with faith that this world is not completely lost, as she slogs through everything life throws at her without wasting too much time regretting paths she might have taken.

In the last few weeks, she moved from Drone to Zombie mode in continuing to get up at 5AM while staying late into the evening planning* and preparing everyone around her for her absence at this crucial stage of the year, making plans and more, all to be sure that her extremely underprivileged, forgotten students don't stop the unprecedented (and thankfully, quantifiable in enough areas to buy her some leeway) progress they've made since she took this school by storm last year.

All this leads up to her, a person about as averse to even the idea of surgery as you're likely to find, getting carved up with only the hope of feeling better at some point next year, even without that last little bit of handy buffer between the bones of her hip joint.

We may be back here some day down the road for the other hip, but hopefully it will hear enough horror stories from this one to shape up all by itself.

As for the kickboxing, no matter how successful her recovery is, I don't think she'll be dropping into any Thai cage matches or ill-advised college P.E. classes any time soon.

* Thanks to my parents, she has a place to stay that isn't up three flights of stairs, and thanks to them (and my sister), I'll have a little help managing the kids during J-'s recovery.

** Fifteen special-needs teenagers in one classroom equals 15 separate daily plans.


Kat said...

I am wishing a speedy recovery to J. Your wife sounds an awful lot like a few of my friends, sacrificing her holidays in order to make sure that the rest of the people who depend on her are taken care of properly. She is one special lady.

unmitigated me said...

Oh yeah. What-EVER. Just means I have to hang out with relatives this holiday instead of having some real fun. It's always me, me, me.

Kevin McKeever said...

I thought J-'s limp was from carrying you on her back all these years?

Best of luck on the operation and the recovery ... for both of you.

Anonymous said...

And a speedy recovery to all and to all a good surgery.

Ali said...

Good luck with surgery, Mrs. LiteralDan! Enjoy the painkillers and time off your feet:)

Kori said...

She is far stronger than I am! You are lucky to have her.

Swirl Girl said...

Take care of her...she sounds like quite a special lady!

Irrational Dad said...

If I may offer any advice at all... No matter how painful, make sure she does all the exercises that the physical therapist gives her.

Good luck!

Renee said...

I second Joe's comment. It will mean all the difference in the world.

That said, baby the heck out of that woman. She should be swaddled and rocked to sleep if you have to.

Also, if she doesn't already have a Wii, I recommend buying her one. Also, Animal Crossing: The City. Best game ever, especially when recovering from surgery.

Jenny Grace said...

Eek. Good luck to her, and to your whole family.

Anonymous said...

What a strong woman you got yourself. Yes, pamper her silly (which I'm sure you will 'cause that's the kind of dude you seem to be), speedy recovery and Happy Thanksgiving week...

AJ said...

Hope all goes well!

Leslie said...

Oh dear. Here's good wishes for her quick recovery.

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

Damn, that really sucks!! I am sending good vibes to your wife and hoping for a speedy recovery. I am also sending you good luck (whilst secretly laughing behind my hand) on dealing with your convalescent wife and all the children desperate for her attention.

So...good luck.

Anonymous said...

Okay, I just 'got' the title of this post. It is quite sick and unbelievably funny.

Speedy Recovery to the Mrs.

Anonymous said...

LD, sounds like you have The Jewel In The Lotus. You are blessed by her presence. take care of her, as I know you will.

Om Mani Padme Hum....

Momo Fali said...

Gulp. I will be thinking of you both, but especially your wife. I pray for a speedy recovery and most of all, that she will feel much better when this is all said and done.

Michael from dadcation.com said...

Hope all goes well. That doesn't sound fun at all. Happy thoughts for the Literal family at Thanksgiving!

The Microblogologist said...

Wow, I hope the surgery went well and she recovers quickly! Don't let her do what my mom did, she tried to push it too soon and had a setback, thankfully not to the point of needing another surgery. And if there is PT in her future, as there likely is, then try and help her make the commitment to it if she needs the extra push (I know I could use it!).


Chris M. said...

No one's done it yet, I think...


Not that she's a ho or anything.

I'm going to shut up now.

Weather Moose

PS - Hope it goes well.

Midwest Mom said...


Here's a hint (from a Mom who has been through surgery)... There are a few things that will help her make it through.

- Netflix

- earplugs

- something *great* to read

- Really good chocolate... in plentiful supply

... okay, maybe the last one is the most important.

I hope your family has a fantastic Thanksgiving and that you wife has a speedy, but lasting, recovery.

Anonymous said...

Hey Literaldan, been lurking. My wife showed me this today. Apparently we are supposed to talk more...!

Would like to hear your/your readers thoughts: http://deviswithbabies.blogspot.com/2008/11/what-boy-wants-what-boy-needs.html

Mrs4444 said...

I will not look at the turkey legs being pulled off tomorrow without thinking of your poor, poor wife. Glad she has you to help.

Andrea said...

The best of luck to your wife! I think the timing is great--relax and let others take care of the holidays.

I personally am jealous!

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your family!!!

Pam said...

hope everything goes well & a speedy recovery. nice to know you have family to help. i think j is one tough lady. :)