09 July 2008

Classic quotes, Vol. 5

I almost didn't make it to post today for the first time since mid-February, since I've been putting in some long hours working for my dad this week, but I'm here during a break with a quickie post as a declaration of victory* over my procrastination demons.

So without further ado, here are some more lines uttered by our family in recent days, extra heavy on the M-, just like you ordered:

M- (anytime someone sneezes): Bwessss youuu!

M- (anytime anyone expresses pain): Sorr-ree.

M- (anytime she or anyone else burps or causes a sound even remotely resembling flatulence): Scuse mee!!

M- (anytime anyone has food, while approaching with an open mouth): Biiiiite-it.

D-: Well... it's not doin' what I want it to do, so I hit it. (simple explanation for his Hulk-like rage and subsequent violence against his belt... while wearing it)

Me (whilst discussing each other's favorite clothes we hate-- my holey old shirt vs. a hideous pair of J-'s shoes): There's not that much difference between a nipple and a stupid glued-on plastic spangle [as clothing decoration].

M- (upon seeing a surfing penguin emerge from a potentially lethal wave during an otherwise quiet moment in the movie theater**): Haa-ha-HAA!!

* Only in this mere, minor skirmish, of course. The war will rage on till the day I die... if I get around to that.

** No, this isn't a really old quote-- we just went to a free kids' show of it this morning. Isn't free stuff wonderful? Especially when your kids can shout stuff at the screen and at times not even be heard over all the other .


TentCamper said...

Very cute...and funny. I did though get kinda lost with the whole nipple thing. Maybe I am just tire. I don't know. I might just get a bit flustered when I see, hear or read anything about those beautiful, perky, succulent....oh...wow...sorry...I was getting carried away again.

Brittany said...

1. Surfs up is quite possibly the best kids movie ever...or maybe I am just deliriously tired of Cars and the Bee Movie.

2. I could not agree more on the t shirt fight. I wear my favorite clothes until they literally disintegrate off of my body (hello holey Stones shirt from the 80's)...although I may have a tougher time passing off the whole nipple thing.

Anonymous said...

Good ones! You reminded me that we need to hit the free movies this summer - I had forgotten about that and how great it is to not have to worry about the kids being loud.

MsPicketToYou said...

i am totally stealing the "biiiite-it" line.

Kori said...

We have a free summer thing at the movies for kids, a different movie every week for six weeks. Also free bowling on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Gotta love that. I love D's line about hitting it; I mean, I try to not be gender biased, but that is SUCH a guy thing!

Anonymous said...

I have something in common with M-, then. I also use the phrase "Bite it." Usually in a different context.

Anonymous said...

"It's not doin' what I want it to do, so I hit it." So, while I realize that I shouldn't (probably) be laughing at that...I AM! Classic.

Anonymous said...

Can I give some advice to the Mrs. LiteralDan?
Wait until he's out of the house for at least an hour, clean out the closet/dresser your way, and immediately hide all evidence in the nearest dumpster. Works everytime in this house...and not just with a closet/dresser

TerriRainer said...

Laughing in a movie theater...kids ALWAYS seem to pick odd moments.

My son roared LOUDLY when Qui Gon Win (sp?), the guy Liam Neison (again sp?) played, was killed by the dark sythe (sp?) in one of the Star Wars movies.

As you can see from my "I'm too lazy to care about correct Star Wars spelling" I went because it was #1 FREE, #2 He's a boy and I knew he'd like it, and finally #3 Liam Neison is hot for an older Scottish guy....THEN MY SON LAUGHS (SUPER LOUD) WHEN HE DIES!!!!!

Soooo not cool.

:) Terri

Jennifer said...

Free summer movies?? How have I not heard of this?

Ronnica said...

I answered the questions about you...thanks for playing along!

LiteralDan said...

TentCamper: Well, the nipples were mine, but you're right, they are definitely perky and succulent. Beauty, though, is as always firmly in the eye of the beholder.

Brittany: I am definitely tired of Cars, and I would quickly tire of Bee Movie. And for the record, my infamous holey shirt, which I never wore outside the house, was thrown away long ago. I only invoke it's holy name when I need to make a point.

Tierd: It is indeed nice, cause I hate trying to determine what is acceptable and what's too big a disturbance. I was actually impressed with how quiet it was, considering the potential.

Ms Picket To You: Her licensing rates are very reasonable. Just contact her agent for information and to have a contract mailed out to you.

Kori: Free bowling? You've got us beat.

Middle Aged Woman: I have no idea whatsoever what you're talking about. What other possible meaning could it have? Surely not an offensive one.

Christy: Sadly, he does this all the time. I only do it when I'm not IN whatever I'm hitting (and usually not with the kids around, in case they ever decide I'm not doing what they want me to.

MamaNeena: Traitor! I'm not too worried, because she'd be wayyyy too exhausted most days to undertake such a thing. And I hardly ever leave the house for very long without her. We always keep an eye on each other, like con men or pirates or something.

TerriRainer: Dude, you sp'd all those sp terms wrong. I think secretly you know how to spell them all right, and that was all just a cover. Did he explain why he laughed? An unusual grief response, or just seeing through the questionable acting and surprisingly poor production values? (That's right-- glossy computer-game shots do not high production values make.)

Jennifer: I hope you're lucky enough to have it wherever you are-- check out the websites of whatever movie chains are in your area (there aren't many left these days...) to see if they have a similar program. I know AMC/Loews and Kerasotes do it, at least.

Ronnica: You were dead on, as far as I'm concerned-- your skill is uncanny!

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